My last 3 birthdays haven't gone as planned.
2019: My paternal grandmother passed away days before her birthday. We buried her on mine.
2020: I planned a solo vaca to Tulum, Mexico. The pandemic hit and it was the week EVERYTHING shut down. My trip was cancelled.
2021: I received a call the day before planning to leave for Houston for another solo bday/thrifting trip. My maternal grandmother was in critical condition in Florida. I decided to drive to FL instead.
This year, I started my birthday in reflection, watching the sun rise on the beach (which is conveniently 15 min from my aunt's house). What came from that? Clarity.
Of all things, peace gives me the greatest joy - despite the location or circumstance. Endless shots, gifts, thrift shopping, kind notes, company of others alone don't bring me joy. Definitely HAPPINESS but not peace. This is also probably why I LOVE people and making friends but appreciate and prioritize solitude.
I also learned that I've gotten better with not being in control. I've learned to be okay with things not going as planned or happening when I want them to.
It was meant for me to be in Florida with my grandmother. It was meant for me to have a quarantine birthday last year. It was meant for me to again, be surrounded by family in celebration of my paternal grandmother two years ago. I may not have realized why at the time but I have peace in knowing that things DO go as planned... just not always as I planned.
Many thanks to everyone for the messages, posts, calls, facetimes, videos, gifts, monetary gifts, well wishes and prayers! I am beside myself at the outpour. I'm so grateful for you thinking of little old me. PEACE and love to you all!
Yours in thrift,